A rant, humour me....

It took me a long time to forget the image after I had closed the newspaper; the x-ray image of a female’s face. It was horrific. The bullet had blown off one side of her face. The cheekbone had destroyed the eyes; there was a gaping hole where the teeth should have been, the ones we brush every day. I was aghast, angry, depressed helpless all at the same time. It was pathetic that a well wisher was fighting against time seeking asylum for her in some country to save her life. She didn't want to go back to where she came from, she was mortally terrified. “The perpetrator has been arrested”, the news item claimed further, a sorry attempt at a consolation. She won’t smile, ever.

Few months back, I came across another story where a college girl was attacked by a man who threw a bottle full of acid on her face. Jilted lover, rage, arrested, prison, out. Good. How can a man who loves her do this to her? Are the women just trophies? Are we still cavemen? Or perhaps is it the basic instinct? Are we still hiding behind that defense? “Man is stronger. Male should dominate the female” I don’t know; is it that I’m just naive, meek “unmanly”? Really? Back in my school days, I came to know that some quantity of conc. acid had spilt onto my teacher’s hand in a freak accident.After a few months, I inadvertently caught a glimpse of the burnt hand. I did not have the stomach to look at her hand ever again. That was her hand, this is her face. Anyone who has held a woman’s face would know how reassuring it is just to have the softness of the skin in your hands; the beauty, the love, and this person decides to scar it forever, in a fit of rage. Rage? Madness, maybe. What is wrong with humanity.

I read about this poor girl who had burnt herself unable to bear the ‘treatment’ meted out to her by her “in-laws”. Yes, a case of Dowry, Case registered, culprits absconding. Most of us, including me, turned to the next page, found that page also boring and jumped to the sports or the gossip sections. A girl had died. She was just married. I wince when the water in my bath gets too hot for comfort. I remember posturing over my burn wound which was just the size of a 50 paise coin, this female, probably just as old as me, decided to burn herself. She would have cried, shrieked while she burned. She had decided to die. The searing pain was nothing compared to what she had to endure otherwise. But, one may never know. Maybe, she didn’t want to die once she was in flames; the heat might have been too much to bear, she might have shrieked for help. She died. What is left? The angry, grieving parents, contrite in-laws and a charred body that could’ve been a woman, a beautiful woman, to be loved, treasured. The ridiculousness of this all boiling down to the mute parents, who believed a girl’s place, was rightfully with the husband. She probably swallowed all the poison to avoid bringing them grief. Sad. The so called ‘in-law’, also a female, an icon of avarice, lost all sense of humanity to what end? Do we blame the women now? Older women? The society? Culture? Tradition? Pathetic. It is just beautiful how all this gets swept under the rug tomorrow, in the name of ‘fate’, ‘penance for previous birth’ and other nonsense. The weddings go on, buying grooms and selling brides.

Then, there is domestic abuse, honour killing and I could go on and on. I’m just talking about news in the Indian newspapers here and I should probably stop at that. Every succeeding paragraph seems to increase in its weight and I am already beginning to sound delirious and frustrated.  

Is it wrong to be a woman? Is it wrong to look beautiful? Is it wrong to be feminine? Is it wrong to be compassionate and considerate? I should probably curse all men. But I won’t. Women do indulge men's 'peccadilloes'; women are mothers and mothers in law too. 

A girl loves a guy, no. A girl wants to study more, no. A girl doesn't care for an offspring, OMG NO WTF. A girl drinks, against Indian culture, premarital sex, whore. who is the judge? Who are the jury?

I have exhausted myself writing. I’m going to fetch a bag of popcorn, sit down and watch an old classic where:
a) A woman will be raped by the bad guy.
b) She will hang herself.

Sex? Love? Beauty? NO. We shall tell our kids, God gave them to us. But Rape is OK,even legal, in all probability. In retaliation, She could wield a knife slash his face, kill the guy, maim his face  with acid, burn him alive, shoot him through the face; so many options.No, She won’t, that will be too violent for her and the audience.Being pure,cultured and steeped in traditional values. She dies. After all, what is life without honour? 

Culture, respect, worship, elders, prestige, dowry, entitlement, authority, domination, rape, death.

Driving class...

The whole of February was spent trying to comprehend why the car from the driving institute was behaving the way it was. But after 15 classes (completed in bursts of 3 or 4 days with gaps of 3 or 4 days in between), they deemed me fit to drive a maruti 800.

Some stuff about the class:

1. The guy who was teaching me was 80.
2. The car was as old as him in car years. The car may have been older(pending verification)
3. The gear box was well oiled and awesome.
4. A gearshift involved stepping on the clutch with both feet and using both hands to shift.
5. The gearshifts were done with the grace of a Djokovich backhand, the only issue being that I was reversing a car, not returning a serve.
6. I completed 15 classes before he could die. He sent a silent prayer to every deity we crossed on the way, to stay alive. I would like to believe it was not due to my driving but more due to his age.
7. The brake had a generous play , almost as good as the clutch.
8. The car was capable of a top speed of 60 kph.
9. At 60 kph, the car rocked up, down & side to side.
10. All the six deg. of freedom were experienced at 61 kph, indicating the mortal peril the car was in.
11. The instructor almost had a heart attack at 60.
12. The safe speed of driving was 30 kph. Any road, any condition.
13. Any speed above 30 resulted in the instructor palpitating.
14. Hence, At the end of 15 days I was well equipped to drive a car at a wedding procession.

 Other stuffs for learners - fyi type stuffs:

1. The car turns off; shuts down and takes a nap whenever and wherever it wants to. You should not expect any sense of etiquette or humanitarian consideration.
2. The clutch, accelerator balance can be achieved by forgetting about it altogether.
3. You can look at the rear-view mirror, the side-view mirror and completely forget the windshield.
4. Objects like trucks and buses on the rear-view mirror are scarier than they appear.
5. The car is always there to take the blame for any of your shortcomings - Bad suspension (when you avoid a pothole by driving over it), Stupid transmission (when you forget your clutch), dirty windscreen (I’m not expanding this).bad seats, car is old, car is useless, no AC, etc.
6. One never knows where the edge of the car is, it is common to get an adrenalin rush just avoiding cyclists on the shoulder.
7. Tip: To turn a car without power steering: keep turning till the curd foams into butter.
8. All motorists are bastards. Except you.
9. Stray dogs, buffaloes, goats and rats have the right of way before you.
10. Buffaloes are colour blind, but, if you sound horn, they start guessing the car’s colour, in consultation with an ad-hoc panel of executives and friends.
11. For safety, the Indian roads provide you with steering assist. It is just a little random and unpredictable.
12. If you are a six footer, it is better you don’t drive with a hot girl to avoid steering issues.
13. The reversing tones have not yet moved to polyphonic. They Will not, ever.
14. Reversing is so fast; you would think the car was in 4th gear.
15. Please wear your seat-belts, carry Life vests, oxygen masks, two fire extinguishers , a blanket and 2 aspirins (for the instructor in case of cardiac failure).
16. There are no airbags so please drive safe, You are already in a sorry looking car.