Driving class...

The whole of February was spent trying to comprehend why the car from the driving institute was behaving the way it was. But after 15 classes (completed in bursts of 3 or 4 days with gaps of 3 or 4 days in between), they deemed me fit to drive a maruti 800.

Some stuff about the class:

1. The guy who was teaching me was 80.
2. The car was as old as him in car years. The car may have been older(pending verification)
3. The gear box was well oiled and awesome.
4. A gearshift involved stepping on the clutch with both feet and using both hands to shift.
5. The gearshifts were done with the grace of a Djokovich backhand, the only issue being that I was reversing a car, not returning a serve.
6. I completed 15 classes before he could die. He sent a silent prayer to every deity we crossed on the way, to stay alive. I would like to believe it was not due to my driving but more due to his age.
7. The brake had a generous play , almost as good as the clutch.
8. The car was capable of a top speed of 60 kph.
9. At 60 kph, the car rocked up, down & side to side.
10. All the six deg. of freedom were experienced at 61 kph, indicating the mortal peril the car was in.
11. The instructor almost had a heart attack at 60.
12. The safe speed of driving was 30 kph. Any road, any condition.
13. Any speed above 30 resulted in the instructor palpitating.
14. Hence, At the end of 15 days I was well equipped to drive a car at a wedding procession.

 Other stuffs for learners - fyi type stuffs:

1. The car turns off; shuts down and takes a nap whenever and wherever it wants to. You should not expect any sense of etiquette or humanitarian consideration.
2. The clutch, accelerator balance can be achieved by forgetting about it altogether.
3. You can look at the rear-view mirror, the side-view mirror and completely forget the windshield.
4. Objects like trucks and buses on the rear-view mirror are scarier than they appear.
5. The car is always there to take the blame for any of your shortcomings - Bad suspension (when you avoid a pothole by driving over it), Stupid transmission (when you forget your clutch), dirty windscreen (I’m not expanding this).bad seats, car is old, car is useless, no AC, etc.
6. One never knows where the edge of the car is, it is common to get an adrenalin rush just avoiding cyclists on the shoulder.
7. Tip: To turn a car without power steering: keep turning till the curd foams into butter.
8. All motorists are bastards. Except you.
9. Stray dogs, buffaloes, goats and rats have the right of way before you.
10. Buffaloes are colour blind, but, if you sound horn, they start guessing the car’s colour, in consultation with an ad-hoc panel of executives and friends.
11. For safety, the Indian roads provide you with steering assist. It is just a little random and unpredictable.
12. If you are a six footer, it is better you don’t drive with a hot girl to avoid steering issues.
13. The reversing tones have not yet moved to polyphonic. They Will not, ever.
14. Reversing is so fast; you would think the car was in 4th gear.
15. Please wear your seat-belts, carry Life vests, oxygen masks, two fire extinguishers , a blanket and 2 aspirins (for the instructor in case of cardiac failure).
16. There are no airbags so please drive safe, You are already in a sorry looking car.

Godavari

The expansive sand dunes, the azure bay, The palpably soft portraits, the cool moon rising from a placid lake, the leaves, the dew, a minute before it drops. The greens, the reds the blues, the colours, the contrast and the texture. And sometimes, you sigh and remark “man!! if only I was there, if only I had a camera….”

Then there are times when you forget to take your camera, or you realize, with a camera in hand, a relieved resignation that you are actually a pathetic photographer with a gross shooting acumen of all movie thugs in a chase sequence. Then there are other times, when you have a great camera, you are a reasonably able, and you can probably capture what is in front of you but you stop yourself. The scenes before you have been captured 1000s of times from 100 different angles. There is nothing left to tap from it. Or, you are just plain tired/bored and your hands just refuse to move.

There lies a road that connects Rajahmundry and Amlapuram. It skirts the Godavari, skipping across the river once before the destination. Additionally a small rivulet streaks parallelly along the road, encouraging a thick growth of shrubs and small trees. On a warm morning, the breeze that blows across this road is so polite that the rickety bus feels regal. As the bus shuffles along at bullacartesque speeds, you don’t feel pressed to take out your pen or paintbrush out. You just sit there, enjoy a good meal with excellent service and feel happy, satiated. A straight road, small settlements here and there, the green growth lining the road, a bridge, a concrete bridge majestically spanning across Godavari; they don’t scream at you for attention. The sights seep into you, subliminally soaking you in the weird wonder of commonplace beauty.

So what is it? Should I plan another trip? Take a dozen photographs? Probably not; no, ‘plans’ are for other places . Places that yearn for your eyes and lenses. Loud places. Vain places. No. this trip should not be planned. Another time, another day, when work calls me there, I will trace this route again; the beauty -- unobtrusive, calm and mundane.

KT 1: chilli

So friends, there is another blog out there. A "well tried" food blog is up on blogger to chronicle random stuffs that i cook, eat , like etc. you are welcome to check it http://thcosh.blogspot.in/  :)  (no post as of now, but you are welcome to check it later).

KT is basically Kakinada times: short posts every now and then about things that amuse me here.

So people in AP ( Andhra Pradesh) are known for their spicy food. After 4 months here, I have got a handle on it and now I'm pretty comfortable with it.We, two others of the same age group live in an apartment. I was the last to join the group and by then the system was already in place a maid would cook and clean and us, eat and whine. The trepidation I felt biting into the red cauliflower on the first day was not misplaced. My eyes watered and the mind played strains of violin, sad and ominous. I smiled. I cried.

In time though, it was ok, that is as long as I avoided biting on a chilli piece directly. This is probably what i would call the second phase of acclimatization: Play mine sweeper with food . I mastered the expert maze set by the indomitable beans in one month. 

We all get bored of our routine. All of us singing paeans about "mom's food" really did hate it at some point during our school days. So after mastering the mirchi, I decided the time was ripe to make my life miserable again and try my hand at cooking. Cooking, here, would mean preparing small dishes that compliment or add life to the existing meal prepared by her. (no, not adding salt and pepper). The plan was either cooking up a light breakfast say upma, rava dosa etc or a second subzi or a rasam in the afternoon etc.

So here I was, a fine Sunday morning, back from a walk, fresh, sunny etc. etc. The vegetables are bought by our maid, we don't have a refrigerator as of now, so she buys on a very day basis & we pay her monthly for those. I was still confident of finding the usual stock of "back up veg's"  or the essentials like onions , potatoes, tomatoes etc. . . so after some calisthenics in front of the range, I proceeded to check my inventory. 

No onions, oh my! no tomato too, ha!! 2 potatoes. good. what?? 3 handfulls of green chillis!! what.....